What should I do?

This is quite a late greeting literally and figuratively, the former because its past midnight and i have yet to take a shower >.< and the latter because I  would like to wish a Happy New Year. It's a new year for others to have a fresh start or some who continues. For me, it seems like a fresh one, you know, with the commencement of university nearing 5 days after the Chinese New Year celebration. Never thought i would see the day that I would be attending a university. Seems like yesterday I was donning on my high school uniform; that white collared shirt and bright sea blue pinafore, then hanging out with the peers and just having fun.

 At the end of my Form 5 year and college, I understand now the responsibility some of what my seniors stress over. Not fully, but I'm getting there and I find myself to be stressed over as well. Talk about not wanting to grow. I so do not like how things are currently going. Do not like' may be an understatement, detest seems more fitting in this context. 
Gosh, thing is that, in my mind, I'm not ready for these responsibility and yet i express I want to learn how to handle them. Credit card loans. Scholarships. Driving. Studying aboard (if my results allow me).  Love.  

I'm just so lost on what I want. Sometimes I say to just focus on the present but I cant help to worry about the future. I want it bright. I want it good. I want it happy. But how? What should I do? What CAN I do? I wish the answer would come to me in an obvious manner. LOUD and CLEAR. That even a blind man can sense it. I have grown so tired not knowing. I want to know so I that I can do what I need to do and just live. No worries or doubts because I would know that it would be the right thing to do. This may sound whiny and immature. But hey, I'm only 18 years old. Some have found themselves and some have not. There's still time but hopefully the next time I write another post, I would have found at least a fraction of what i need to be me. 

NEW START?

So....instead of finalizing my Biology Issue Investigation HA i created a blog website instead. I guess reading my friend's blog urge me to find my old one but that couldn't happen cause i forgot the URL for my blog so here I am, making a new one. Well, better get back to my bio. Guess i have to blog about something 'significant' about my life another day. Till next time! :)